January is drawing to a close… I last visited this page in November. I was supposed to turn it into a journal since at that time, I just got my orders that I will be leaving for an overseas post in December. Well, I didn’t leave… I won’t go into specifics but suffice to say that I was shattered. I lost the motivation to write, to run, and I cave in to the sadness and frustration that I felt at that time. For weeks I was in limbo. I was so stressed out; I lost weight without even trying and I was rushed to the ER because of severe gastric pain. Looking back at that particular incident makes me laugh. I cried like a baby when the Doctor wanted to do a skin test because he wants to make sure that I’m not allergic to Diclofenac. I stood my ground and told him that I am not allergic to it and that if I suddenly develop a reaction, I will absolve him of any responsibility. He tried to explain to me why the skin test is needed blah blah blah… only then that I realized that he is damn cute! I suddenly felt the pain vanishing into thin air! Kidding aside, I was released shortly after that and was just given oral medication with a strict instruction from Doctor Cutie that I’ll come back if the pain will not subside… hhhhhmmmm I guess he just wants to see me again!
It took me a while before I told my friends what I am going through… I was having a déjà vu especially when I was subjected into something that brought back all the sad memories of an event that happened almost five years ago. It was like rubbing salt to injury. I so wanted to walk-out and never come back, but I stayed. I stayed through the humiliation and clenched my fist whenever the urge to reason out arises. I learned that patience is indeed a virtue… and for a while there I thought I’d become a Saint for enduring it.
I learned a lot from that experience… cliché as it may seem but I’ve always believed that everything happens for a reason. I had to go through that so I’d appreciate that I am still blessed and that the good still outweighs the bad. I am still grateful for everything that I have. What’s important is I am still here and I still have the time to rectify the mistakes and be a better person altogether.
At this point, I can honestly say that I am beautiful, I am loved, and I am enjoying life 🙂
Watch out for my succeeding posts and I do hope that you will again visit this page to see what I have been up to and for you to once again be entertained by my antics and never-ending quest for adventure.
I love you all!